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The Right to Family

Page history last edited by happylosheng@gmail.com 12 years, 7 months ago

  以下將分享我自身的歷程、一段關於我親兄弟保羅(Paul)的故事。保羅在1941年受漢生病折磨,並被夏威夷政府隔離。

  而我在夏威夷的Kauai出生及長大,而後前往Oahu島及就讀於夏威夷大學,目前定居於Maui島。

 

The Right to Family    Takayuki Harada

 

  「你們要彼此相愛、像我愛你們一樣、這就是我的命令。人為朋友捨命、人的愛心沒有比這個大的。」約翰福音15:12-13。

  1954年6月,我焦急的等待著我未知的兄弟歸來。15年前他從我們家被帶走,正當我站在家門旁的芒果樹下時,這個是我兄弟的男子看著我並輕聲的說了聲

 

  當時我並不確定該說些什麼,我試著與這位陌生人同時也是我兄弟的人產生關係:他叫做保羅,並在被診斷出患有漢生病後送往檀香山治療;他先在Kalihi一個專收漢生病患的地方接受四年的治療,接著被送往Kalaupapa。對於眼前的這個人我一無所知。

 

  面對保羅第一次回來探訪我們在Kauai的家,即使是我的哥哥及嫂嫂們也不知道該如何處理這個情形。健康局的官員認為當時屬於孩童的我們,不應該在保羅探訪期間與他住在一起。當時的我很疑惑:為何我必須和弟弟妹妹,在整個保羅來訪期間一起去住大哥哥家。其實我認為應該可以跟他住在一起,並且彌補彼此的關係。

  我很確定我的父母對於保羅回到家真的非常高興。他第一次離開家,是我父親帶他於Oahu診斷出患有漢生病後,隨即被滯留於Kalihi醫療院所(holding station),而母親及兄弟姐妹們都沒有機會向他說聲再見。每當保羅的名字在家裡被提及時,我知道母親總是從房間離開去哭泣。

 

  當保羅不被允許與我父親一起回家時,我非常難以想像父母是如何走過這一段的。那就像從地球上消失一樣。保羅與我家庭的聯絡是相當少的,若有,我也從未知悉有這樣的聯繫存在。我相信我姊在非常有限的方式下與他保持聯絡。

 

   1945年,他被船載往Kalaupapa。由於當時沒有治癒的方法,因此這對全世界所有的病患而言就如同被判死刑一般。因為疾病所附帶的污名,使父母很少談及保羅,他們知道保羅最終的命運會是什麼。

 

  縱使漢生病的治癒方式在1941年已被發現,惟由於第二次世界大戰,因此並未能提供給夏威夷的病患使用。當保羅被送往Kalaupapa時,他認為自己會在1950年死亡。當時他的傷口遍及全身,且由於免疫系統失靈而導致他呼吸困難。也就因為有呼吸上的問題,因此他便開始在當地的海岸潛水捉魚,乾淨的海水可以清理他的鼻腔而使他能更順暢的呼吸。

 

  後來Kalaupapa的患者終於取得新藥,而保羅的狀況也在1954年11月有了好轉,同時他也獲得了暫時的行動自由,也就是在此時他回到家探訪親人。當時的家庭成員有三個弟妹及兩個比保羅大的哥哥仍住在家中,其他五個孩子則在唸大學及在Oahu工作。

 

  1955年4月23日,保羅與Winifred Marks結婚,婚後他們有回家探訪。這兩次的探訪使他們和家人更親密。1965年,我正前往拜訪一名住在Molokai島的友人,並被要求致電保羅。幫我打給他時,他邀請我們去peninsula。隔天一早,我們一行四個人走了1.5碼的歧嶇小徑。我們花了美好的一整天在釣魚及認識保羅及他的妻子維妮(Winnie)。

 

  這是一段長久關係的開始,包括許多次的拜訪來更認識彼此,以及建立更親密更充滿愛的關係。逾40年來,只要我可以我便會去拜訪他,去更認識身為大哥的他。我相信我們越來越像兄弟一樣的親密。                                                                

───

  後來我開始廣泛的閱讀任何與Kalaupapa歷史有關的東西,我了解到讓更多的人去經歷這些故事並把這些事分享給更多的人的重要性,因此我帶朋友去參觀並體驗這個神聖而充滿力量的地方。我要我的朋友們去認識病患所經歷這具有毀滅力量的隔離,以及許多患者依其信念而衍生的希望。

 

  保羅的日文本名是Tadashi。當他在Kalihi時,他對宗教產生好奇並在於其後信仰天主教。為了去了解及滿足他對於許多信仰及宗教神秘之處的好奇,他提出許多疑問。在他正被轉送往Kalaupapa時,他發現自己受到天主教的慰藉,因此他改採用Paul Tadashi Harada為新的名字。我確信他之所以選擇這個名字的來由乃是新約聖經中的使徒保羅(the great Christian Apostle Paul of the New Testament)。

 

  我達成了帶我所有的孩子去參訪Kalaupapa的目標,他們超喜歡的。他們喜歡叔叔和阿姨熱愛他們及招待他們。我的孫子Sean Tadashi DeCambra也命名為保羅。我的女兒們也邀請他們的朋友前來,而他們全都愛上那裡。每位參訪者都認識了這個很特別叫做Kalaupapa的地方,所有對於漢生病的害怕及感受都在一次次的參訪中被拭去。

 

  這是我大約40年來拜訪這個特別地方的目標。保羅和維妮盡極佳的地主之誼,且總是花時間向我的賓客們「說故事」。我從不遲疑的向賓客們介紹保羅和維妮,我為他們倆感到驕傲,並且經常向我的朋友提及他們。

 

  我曾帶醫師作家政治人物及不同國籍的人去Kalaupapa,所有的人總懷著敬畏與驚嘆,並很感謝有這個獨特的機緣能與保羅及維妮交談。他們倆總是非常開放的分享他們的經驗:包括被隔離孤獨痛苦,以及他們發現信念希望和愛。

───

  當我們為此會議而共聚一堂,一個非常重要的任務即是要重新努力的分享他們的生命故事,如此一來,新的世代將會繼續分享這苦中帶甜的生命歷練,也可確保他們的故事能一直活在下一代的心目中。

 

  保羅和維妮已為我們家完成了這項任務。我來自於一個擁有10的孩子的家庭,除了最大的哥哥因為怕搭乘小型飛機因此無法前往外(此為前往該處的唯一途徑),每一個孩子都曾去過Kalaupapa,且我大哥仍在每次保羅回到家時都與他相處融洽。保羅的每一個兄弟姐妹都已婚,且大多數的孩子們都有機會拜訪Kalaupapa。他們每一個都馬上渴望能再回到那裏,因為他們太喜歡與保羅叔叔及維妮阿姨相處的時光。

 

  身為一個家庭,我們積極努力去重新建立與保羅的新關係,並再次成為完整的一體。即使自從他初次離家後,我們喪失許多年與他相處的機會,但我們承諾彼此在最後的40年中,盡可能的用時間與他重新建立關係。保羅和維妮在我們Harada家庭中越趨特別,他們成為激勵我們所有人的力量。當保羅過世時,家中還在世且最年長的哥哥緬懷到:「他讓全家人有了重心。Kalaupapa島雖有德米昂神父(Father Damien),但對於我們Harada家而言,沒有任何人比保羅更神聖。」

 

  這一切是怎麼發生的?他可能成為一個非常暴厲而痛苦的人,但我相信這是保羅對於其自身所被要求的事有必須達成的認知而言。他了解到:若他不與家人分開,家庭會逐漸的被污名、恐懼、及所處週遭環境中的冥頑不靈而摧毀。

 

  我的人生極可能成為人間煉獄,而社會也可能把我們和整個世界分開,而我將永遠沒有機會與各位說話。成就這個故事的是,他送給身為弟弟我的禮物:他的一生。

───

  現在,謹以一首我在他過世那晚所寫的詩作為結尾。

 

詩名:保羅

 

今日晚霞特別閃耀

加上某個人閃亮的光束

你的靈魂光輝向聖潔前進

你的手向天堂高舉

你的微笑向夜晚的天空輻射出去

穿上Kalaupapa的風

依著大自然合諧一致

你的光芒永恆閃耀

 

淚和傷拋諸腦後

而每滴淚水卻洗淨我們靈魂

你的存在將永不離我們而去

在記憶裡你將永恆存活

你的嗓音笑語熱血的個性

將對於所有曾因你而感動的人構成一部份

每一位曾與你在海邊沙灘共度時光的人

或在寧靜海中 或在岩石岸上

 

今日你實質上離開了我們

一點點將你的生命帶離

你的生命對我們每一個人而言太重大而難以承受

不是害怕或苦痛或淚水

不是分離或寂寞或遺棄

亦非恐懼或絕望或空虛

因你生命中的信念希望和愛

這些主賜的禮物會領你前往天國

 

此刻是真愛的時刻

當第一眼見到你時我們便已愛著你

Lumahai谷的芒果樹下

當你回到你出生的地方

開始著與我們每個人合為一體的長遠旅程

縱使兄弟姐妹們有些許疑惑但仍舊欣喜

你再次成為兄弟及朋友

直到永遠

 

Taka Harada  01-04-08

 

 

"The Right to Family".  I will be sharing my own journey with my relationship with my brother Paul who was stricken by leprosy in 1941 and was isolated by the State of Hawaii.  

I was born and raised on Kauai, Hawaii. I went to the Island of Oahu and went to the University of Hawaii and now currently living on the Island of Maui.

The Right to Family    Takayuki Harada

“This is a new commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friend”.  John15:12-13

In June of 1954, I anxiously awaited the return of a brother I never knew.  He had been taken away from our family 13 years before.  As I stood under a mango tree next to our house, this man who was my brother looked at me and said in a soft voice, “Hi!”.

I wasn’t sure what to say.  I wanted to try to connect with this stranger/brother, named Paul, who was diagnosed with leprosy and sent to Honolulu for treatment.  He was treated for four years at Kalihi, a holding station for those with leprosy, and was later sent to Kalaupapa.   I knew little of this man who stood before me.

Even my older brothers with their wives, were unsure how to deal with Paul’s first return visit to our home in Kauai. The officials from the Department of Health felt that as children, we should not reside in the same household as Paul during his entire visit.  I was confused about why they required my younger brother, sister, and I to live with my oldest brother for the duration of Paul’s visit.  I thought that we would have been able to live together and to renew our relationship.  

I am sure my Dad and Mom were truly happy to have him home. When he first left home, my Dad took him to Oahu to where he was diagnosed with leprosy and was immediately retained at the Kalihi holding station.  My Mom and siblings had no opportunity to say good bye. I understood that whenever his name was mentioned at home, my mom would always leave the room crying.

It is hard for me to imagine what my parents went through when Paul was not allowed to return with my father.  It was as if he disappeared from this earth. There was little communication between Paul and our family.  If there was, I was totally unaware of any such communication.  I believe my oldest sister kept in touch with him in a very limited way.

In 1945, he was shipped to Kalaupapa.  As with all patients throughout the world,  it was a death sentence, since there was no cure at that time.  My parents hardly talked about Paul because of the stigma that was attached to the disease. They were aware of the Paul’s ultimate fate.

Although the “cure” for Hansen’s Disease was discovered in 1941, it was not provided to the patients in Hawaii at that time because of World War II.  When Paul was sent to Kalaupapa, he felt that he would die by 1950.  His sores were covering his body and he could hardly breathe because of the breakdown of his immune system.  It was because of his breathing problems that he started fishing.  Diving for fish in the clear waters of the Kalaupapa shoreline, the salt water helped him to clear his nostrils so he could breathe more easily.

Eventually the patients at Kalaupapa were provided with the new medications.  Paul’s condition became better and in November, 1954, he was given a temporary release. It was during this time that he came back to Kauai to visit the family. At that time the family members still living at home consisted of the three youngest children and two brothers who were older than Paul. The other five children in the family were away at college or working on Oahu.

On April 23, 1955, Paul  married Winifred Marks.  After their marriage, they returned to Kauai for a visit.  These two visits endeared them to the rest of the family.  In 1965, I was visiting a friend on the Island of Molokai and was told to call Paul. When I called him, he invited us to come down to the peninsula. The next morning, four of us walked down the mile and a half of rugged trail. We spent a wonderful day of fishing and getting to know my brother Paul and his wife, Winnie.

This was the beginning of a long relationship that involved many visits spent in getting to know each other and building a close and loving relationship.  For over 40 years, I visited Paul whenever I could, getting to know him as an older brother. I believe we became very close as brothers.

Eventually, as I began to read everything about the history of Kalaupapa, I realized how important it was that this story be shared and experienced by as many people as possible. I took many friends to visit and experience this spiritual and powerful land.  I wanted my friends to understand the devastating separation these patients experienced and the subsequent hope that so many patients found in their faith.

Paul’s Japanese name was Tadashi. When he was at the Kalihi holding station, he became curious about religion and later chose to become a part of the Catholic faith.  He asked many questions to understand and to satisfy his own curiosity about the many mysteries of faith and religion. He found that he was comfortable with Catholicism and by the time he was transferred to Kalaupapa, he adopted and changed his name to Paul Tadashi Harada. I am sure he chose that name after the great Christian Apostle Paul of the New Testament.

I made it a point to take all of my children to visit Kalaupapa.  They loved it. They enjoyed their uncle and aunty who adored them and treated them very well. My grandson, Sean Tadashi DeCambra, was named after Paul.  My daughters invited their friends and they all came to love the place.  Each of these visitors became knowledgeable about this special place called Kalaupapa. The fear and perceptions about “leprosy” were erased with each visit.

 This has been my goal for almost forty years of visiting this special place. Paul and Winnie were such wonderful hosts, and always took time to “talk story” with my guests. I had no qualms about introducing my guests to Paul and Winnie.  I was proud of them and talked often of them with my friends.

I have taken doctors, authors, politicians, and people of all nationalities to Kalaupapa.   All have come away with a sense of awe and wonder, and great appreciation for their unique opportunity to talk with both Paul and Winnie. Paul and Winnie were always very open about sharing their experiences of separation, loneliness, anguish, and their discovery of faith, hope, and love.

As we gather at this conference, It is so important to renew our efforts to share their stories, so that generations to come will continue to share in this bitter- sweet experience and to insure that their legacy will be kept alive for generations to come.

Paul and Winnie have done this for our family. I come from a family of 10 children. Everyone has gone to Kalaupapa except my oldest brother who was afraid of flying in small planes which unfortunately was the only way to get to Kalaupapa.   However he and my oldest brother enjoyed each other whenever he came to visit the family on Kauai.  Each of Paul’s brothers and sisters married and most of their children have had the opportunity to visit Kalaupapa.   Each came away with an immediate desire to return to Kalaupapa whenever they could, as they so greatly enjoyed spending time with Uncle Paul and Aunty Winnie.

As a family, we have actively worked to become whole and complete again and to rebuild our relationship with Paul.  Though we lost many years with Paul after he was initially removed from our family, we committed to spending as much time as we could with him to rebuild our relationship in the last forty years.  Paul and Winnie have become very special to the Harada family. They became an inspiration to the rest of us.  As my oldest surviving brother commented when Paul had passed away, ”There was something about him that everyone in our family gravitated to.  Kalaupapa has Father Damien, but for us in the Harada family, there was no person more saintly than Paul”.  

How did this happen?  He could have been a very angry and bitter man. But I believe it has to do with the recognition by Paul that he had to do what was required of him.  He came to the realization that if he did not separate himself from the rest of the family, the family would literally be destroyed by the stigma, fear, and the bigotry of the world around us.

My life would have been a living hell and society would have surely separated us from the rest of the world.  I might never have had this opportunity to speak to you.  What has made this story what it is, is his gift to me “that he lay his life for his little brother”.

At this time I would like to close with a poem I wrote the night he died.

Paul

The evening sunset shone brighter this day

Within the rays of light was added another

For your soul shone forth its purity

As your hands reached for the heavens

Your smile radiated in the evening sky

Clothed with the winds of Kalaupapa

Together with the oneness of nature

Forever eternally your light to shine!

Left behind are the tears of sadness

Yet, each tear will cleanse our soul

Your presence will never leave us

For it lives in memories that are eternal and forever

You voice, your laughter, your effervescent nature

Became a part of all who were touched by your presence

Everyone who shared a moment with you on a sandy beach

Or by the calming seas or on a rocky shoreline!

Today you leave with us your very essence

Each with a little part of your life

A life too large for each of us to bear

Not the scars or the pain or the tears

Nor the separation or the loneliness or the abandonment

Not the fears or the hopelessness or the emptiness

But in your life were faith and hope and love

The gift of your God who lifted you to the heavenly places!

This moment is a moment of true love

We have loved you from the moment we saw you

Under the mango tree in Lumahai Valley

When you came home to your birth place

To begin the long road of oneness with each of us

Though as siblings we were a little confused but happy

You became our brother and friend again

For all eternity!

(Taka Harada  01-04-08)

 

 

 

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